Let’s talk about you. Where are you now? Where do you want to be? What’s stopping you? Take a minute and reflect on these questions and then jot down the answers.
How do you feel? Accomplished? Or like you need to put in some more work before where you are and where you want to be is aligned?
The goal is to get you to a place where you’re winning, right? That’s what we all want. However, In order for there to be a winner, there has to be a loser, right? So who are you going to overcome? Who is the loser?
The friend who puts you down? The coworker who constantly outperforms you? Maybe. Let’s try to visualize it. Say you accomplish something and end up proving them wrong and outshining them. Great! Success! You did it! Now what? On to the next person that you are trying to prove yourself to.
Take yourself down that same visual path.
Once you’ve proven yourself to them, do you simply move on to the next person? There are over 7 billion people in the world. Are you going to try to prove yourself to each one? I doubt that’s your plan, right? So then, why even concentrate on that one first person?
Let’s try it a different way.
What if I told you that you’re wasting time trying to outperform everyone around you? What if I told you that there’s only one person who can unlock your potential?
There is one person in your life that will constantly push you to your next level. If you truly listen to this person, they will constantly drive you further and further towards your maximum potential. Which, by the way, can look very different to the potential of others. That’s what makes us powerful as humans, knowing how to maximize on our uniqueness.
Confucius said, The will to win, the desire to succeed, the urge to reach your full potential…these are the keys that will unlock the door to personal excellence.
Ever heard of the saying, “Consistency is key”? If consistency is key to success, and winning is also key to success, then consistency must be key to winning. Correct? If that’s the case, then shouldn’t we pay attention to the ONLY voice that is truly consistent in our lives?
Let’s go back to the topic of competition now. Let’s say the only voice you were trying to outperform was your own. And let’s say the only success you were trying to achieve was based solely on your own personal goals and vision of what success looks like. What if you truly focused on making yourself proud?
Would that leave you fulfilled? You’d be following your personal truth so I can’t see how it wouldn’t.
You could be a winner. And the beauty is, it could last forever if it’s your own voice that you’re listening to.
So let’s make sure that voice of yours is the most positive, empowering voice you hear.
According to the National Science Foundation, we have 12,000 – 60,000 thoughts per day. Astonishingly, 80% of those thoughts are negative. In addition, 95% of these are actually repetitive thoughts from the thoughts we had the day before. Which means that we are just repeating the same negative thoughts over and over again. Most of the time, we’re not even realizing we’re doing this but these negative thoughts become our primary voice. Instead of, “I think I can, I think I can”. We’re hearing the exact opposite, daily. No wonder many of us aren’t actually operating at our full potential. We’re not letting ourselves.
These numbers blew me away and got me seriously thinking about the need for all of us to limit these negative thoughts.
Here are some suggestions that I found.
1. Replace the negative thought with a positive one. Be conscious of your thoughts. The minute you hear one that’s negative. Say, “Stop”. And replace it with a positive one. This will slowly break our brain’s habit of feeding us with the same thoughts.
2. Feelings are not facts. We have to remember this. Many of us are reacting to a story that we’ve created based on our perceptions. But feelings are not always facts and thus we’re not always reacting to the most accurate story. Try to see situations as black and white. This will allow you to see them for what they are and any feelings that you have associated with them can then be analyzed from a more logical and less emotional standpoint.
3. Surround yourself with people who empower you. I’m a big believer in attracting your tribe. It’s only natural to absorb the energies around us. We’ve got enough negative talk to battle in our own minds to take on the negativity of others. Try to always surround yourself with people who make you feel happy and empowered.
Finally, do you.
As I mentioned earlier in this article, there is simply no point in trying to prove ourselves to others. It will never seem like enough until we’ve proved ourselves to ourselves. Funny enough, kids have mastered this. It’s only when we approach adult life that the urge to compete and prove ourselves really manifests. So, in times when you feel the need to prove yourself, revert back to a common adage many of us heard as kids.
Today you are you! That is truer than true! There is no one alive who is you-er than you!
– Dr. Seuss.